I guess I am a bad feminist. I bought a sexy halloween costume. That is correct. I am going as a french maid. Tres cliche, I know.
That is my costume, to be exact. So go on, think it. Ho-in-a-bag. Slutastic. Skanky.
But two things are pissing me off on both sides. First of all, I do not like women who think it is ok to call other women sluts for dressing a certain way, even on Halloween. I hate this “I’m not like those girls” attitude.
Secondly, I guess I am a little ashamed that I fell for the costume store’s spell and decided to partake in this trend. Last year I was a sexy Bonnie to my boyfriend’s Clyde. But this is just a little depressing. To be honest, I am depressed enough about it, I don’t know if I even want to go out. But the truth is, it is fun getting tarted up and going out for a night where everyone is, so you don’t feel as judged. It’s fun. But i still think its a bum wrap that all women’s costumes are sexy. (Sidenote: even most of the plus sized ones were..and I tried on a few. I was pleasently surprised.)
My biggest problem is the sexualization/gendering of little girls.
See, I am a grown woman fully aware and in control of my sexuality (as far as society will let me anyway). I am not 12.
At the same time.
Sheesh, I am torn. It just seems like on one hand, it is the fun thing to do and I want to do it. On the other hand, I feel guilty. Why can’t I ever make a decision anymore??!??!?!
6 comments
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October 25, 2008 at 11:06 pm
crankosaur
Argh, a conflict I know well. I love getting dressed up and do so on an almost daily basis, but I feel like the time and money I spend on my appearance is keeping me from doing more important things and, on a larger scale, is contriuting to the staying-power of the beauty myth. But it is so fun! And divorced from a patriarchal context, would it be harmful at all? Sigh. I say as long as you are aware and try to inform others of the political nature of wearing a sexy maid costume or makeup or heels or whatever, you won’t have a net negative impact on the women’s movement. Maybe, as a person who owns a sexy schoolgirl outfit, I am just rationalizing, but as it keeps me from a massive mental breakdown fueled by cognitive dissonance, I think I’ll keep it up.
October 26, 2008 at 5:54 am
Anonymous
Why are French maids the only sexy maids?
October 29, 2008 at 3:19 am
Angelia Sparrow
Go as a sexy zombie maid!
October 29, 2008 at 8:30 pm
MzStilletto
This video was posted on Feministing last year, but it still cracks me up!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrRGp4BSTyE
(Language warning – not safe for work btw)
November 13, 2008 at 3:10 pm
Vicky
The clothes we wear does not define us. It is only an extension of who we are, gloriously multifaceted. I can’t see how being sexy takes away from being a feminist, if that is what you are. Being seen as an object by other people, is their problem not yours, people will say and think what they want to.
I can’t possibly see how standing out as a confident woman can possibly promote the sexualisation/gendering of little girls. Instead I would argue that it promotes a woman’s right to choose, who she is, what she wears, what she is willing to put up with. And that’s a message we as woman should want to get out there for every woman to see.
November 13, 2008 at 7:10 pm
goingtomontreal
THANK YOU! You said it perfectly.